Hello tenderhearts followers and guests,
Welcome to blogpost, quarantine edition. I truly hope you are surviving the times and are healthy. I am praying for my readers and my clients. This time has lead to things we have never experienced before. I am used to going to the grocery stores before a snowstorm, on the east coast here, and seeing empty shelves of bread and milk. (apparently that is staple snowstorm food). Corona has left us with empty shelves of every kind and where it is empty they seem to be re-stocked with fear.
I, like many people, am home without income. A blessing to me has been that the one family who is a regular has paid me to not only keep their place as a client but also to "do the right thing." I am so thankful for their kindness. They have also sent Amazon gifts of fun crafts to do while quarantined. I have also dropped off care packages to friends' porches to give moms of littles something new to do. Hand-me -downs from my house.
As a new mom you have been given a gift of time. Stay home and really learn about your baby. Look for her cues and really focus on her. When you feel stressed take a step back and think about the situation. I have found so many times in my experience of 25 years + that the problem is rarely that the baby is so much of a handful but that all the other things you would like to do are keeping you from reading her cues and responding.
I hope you are using this time well. Besides being a mom of 3 teen girls and my very rewarding doula job, and this blog and creating a course for you all, I'm also a children's church director. Here is a little taste of what I shared with the parents of Point Community Church, Somerset NJ
I just wanted to reach out to those of our congregation with children or have a role in a child’s life. As anxious a time in history as this is for us, your children have even more confusion and possibly fear. Our job for the children we love is to try to make a safe place for them. Helping them feel that you care about them and that their feelings are valid is a huge task. I am going to be posting resources to help you understand what is appropriate to talk about and what things you can do to help our children in this very different time. You can reach out to me and I can email you with the resources. (church members are on slack app)
Try to find the joy in this time we have been given. I want to read the quote I found from Mr. Fred Rogers and then the guidelines the staff of the Fred Rogers Center at St Vincent’s college posted. Read below
I’ll post this as well as some videos and talks about how you can help our PCC children and any children you may influence better understand what is happening and that the adults who love them are keeping them safe.
Blog readers: I'll post more while I am here in quarantine. Please follow me by sending your email and keep checking back for more helpful posts during this trying time.
There are many more resources at
The Fred Rogers Center
Please support their wonderful work and legacy.
As I said months ago, life happened. AND it just kept on happening. To be completely transparent, as I try to do in life, there was longstanding betrayal, emotional abuse and a divorce. My daughters and I have spent the last 10 months in trying to recover and create our new lives. It has been hard as people have come forward to share the ways they tried to protect us from the betrayal. Wave after wave of stories washed over us. Some so hard to believe.
We rebuild now, as the strong daughters we are. I see resilience and life, just like the trees in my yard are coming out of dormancy and beginning to bud again. I feel that way and I see it in my daughters.
My story has redemption in every page.
Part of the rebuilding is getting my blog back on track and working towards that lofty goal of having a course for you. I know some of you that have been reading for a while have toddlers or even pre-schoolers now. If this blog isn't relevant to you anymore, could I ask you to please send a link to a friend. Thank you! I am so filled with joy when I see moms in community, growing strong. being resilient themselves. Keep following your God given intuition and look for the joyful moments to help sustain you. Blessings, Paula
Paula is a single mother of 3. Follow along on her journeys of motherhood and her fulfilling work as a postpartum doula